Calisthenic Week 5

Synesthesia
The fake smile he gave me was probably the driest greeting I've ever experienced.
I could never digest the thickness of that rocket science lecture.
His walk was cracked like the shell of an egg.
Mama's chicken soup had a rainbowy taste to it.
I could feel his life draining like coke down my throat
The bursts of his feelings is still ringing in my ears even though he said not a word.
I bit his life and spat it out like house rats
Your tipsy potato is falling off your plate
The trees look like drunken fools in the rain
Did you really have to stir the life out of that pancake mix?

Sign Inventory Week 5

The poem goes from first person to third person.The speaker seems to be connected to the blackbird because the speaker describes situations around the blackbird instead of the blackbird just being in the background. He notices the blackbird in places other people do not. The speaker is inspired when he sees the blackbird flying because he describes situations like "the river is moving", "the edge of one of many circles", "the bawds of euphony would cry out sharply". When the blackbird is flying everything else around it seems to be moved by it.
Thirteen Ways to Look at a Blackbird by Wallace Stephens
http://www.poets.org/viewmedia.php/prmMID/15746

Junkyard quote 4 Week 5

“Hunter eyes
I’m lost and hardly noticed, slight goodbye
I want to rip your lips off in my mouth
And even in my greatest moment doubt
The line between deceit and right now”


Simple Math, Manchester Orchestra

Junkyard quote 3 Week 5

"Wind

Wise, whirling, wind

Wind is the lord’s rhythm.

Louder than a million trains,"

Wind by Stephen Tyler

Junkyard quote 2 Week 5

This moment’s a segment you think is unique
till it stretches a minute, an hour, a week


ghostsandonionskins@tumblr.com

Junkyard quote 1 Week 5

"Not like the brazen giant of Greek fame,
With conquering limbs astride from land to land;"

The New Colossus by Emma Lazarus

Classmate response 1 Week 4

wow this draft just spews hate from every direction and it's awesome. Every word throws a low blow; none of the words are a waste of space. Even the long, scientific words add a lengthy disgust that cannot be summed up with a short Germanic word. The draft also does a good job of moving, like I can actually feel like a disease is spreading. Once you get halfway through you can't stop reading the insults and the hate just takes over. I can't wait to see what a title for this would be.

Improv Week 4

Improv from Design by Robert Frost

I see a frozen wasp floating like an October leaf,
Held by an ant showing off for me
making their way to the pinery.
A tiny group of green and wings pesting in the sunset light.
Needles poke holes in the earth, the wasp
with its dead stinger, and the ant soldiering with
its weighing catch.


Ok I tried really hard to make this rhyme and I wanted to make my own version of the poem because I like it so much. I gave up after the third line.

Sign Inventory Week 4

Design by Robert Frost
The first stanza does not have any periods, it seems like the speaker's attention is caught up in what he's describing. The second stanza has questions. All of the characters are white and connected or "mixed". The characters are described using words like "kite", "froth", and "cloth", all things that are gentle and can blow in the wind easily.

Junkyard Quote 4 Week 4

"I detest this insipid insomnia
for a host of reasons; but, most of all,
for the reason my love lies sweetly sleeping
not fifty yards down the hall."

Insomnia -whisperedverse.tumblr.com

Junkyard quote 3 week 4

"My first was a flitting faerie"


Reminiscence


whisperedverse.tumblr.com

Junkyard quote 2 week 4

“It’s late and morning’s in no hurry, but sleep won’t set me free.”


Sarah Mclachlan, Wintersong

Junkyard quote 1 week 4

“I want to tear myself from this place, from this reality, rise up like a cloud and float away, melt into this humid summer night and dissolve somewhere far, over the hills. But I am here, my legs blocks of concrete, my lungs empty of air, my throat burning. There will be no floating away.”

—	Khaled Hosseini

calisthenic week 3

I remember when my bike first rode on two wheels
I remember my friend who ate my favorite snacks
I remember when we stopped talking and forgot why
I remember the day I got my dreams in my head

Improv Week 3

These spiky shoes reminds me of my highlights.
Sticky skins, ratted wind blown hair
Packed on the bus with the windows down.
Coach turns his back nods off and
butts fly off to warmer spots.
We're uncut in our shapely spandex
Trying to impress our sex is funny.
It's the loudest energy after every meet.
Sleepy? You'll get lucky if you get slightly gone.
We're not tired so we kiss and grab
What we have left before the bumpy ride ends.
All that work put in when it was just racing.

This draft is about the days after a track meet when we would chill on the bus ride home.

Classmate response2 Week 3

There are so many amazing sounds in this poem, there's alliteration everywhere. This is the kind of poem that you read aloud and the sounds alone give the most to the reader. You do a good job of showing the images. "Butterfly that will soon be chasing stars" is amazing because it's not a predictable way of showing how butterflies fly and I never seem them flying at night so it was cool to picture a butterfly flying at night. The verbs are great because you didn't use any one verb twice.

Free write Week 3

Starting

Starting this up, starting over again.
Rewinding it reversing it to point a.
Pulling back out of park to handle my drive.
Fixing this my wits are here near my new back.
Do it now wish you would I got it this game.
Salting on slugs? But staring at broken shells
Casting down eyes can't see where my spot is soft.
Damning it cause I'm cutting you up down off,
Fuck dude stop I started and you fuck you finished.

Yeah so I didn't mean for this to turn angry at the end. I wanted it to sound optimistic but halfway through I started thinking about times where I've had to get away from negative people who prey on people they see as weak.

Response 1 Week 3

Response to Kyley Elizabeth The Fog
I think with words like candy coated, caught and encapsulated tomb you get a good sense of being trapped in a confining space. After reading the last line of your poem it reminded me of another poem called The Sacred by Stephen Dunn. I just felt like this poem was a reply to The Fog because they both are focused on spaces and how the space makes the speaker feel, but instead of feeling depressed they feel empowered. I think if you did a riff off of The Sacred it could make your poem longer and more positive at the end.

Junkyard Quote 4 Week 3

-Between Canon and Creed
"As I dwell in perdition
I clutch my crucifix
No faith seems to exist
I leave it up to my imagination"

poeticallyprofound.tumblr.com

Junkyard quote 3 Week 3

“Live in each season as it passes: breathe the air, drink the drink, taste the fruit.”

Henry David Thoreau

Sign inventory Week 3

From Kinky by Erika Meitner

-she describes the present in past tense and then goes to a flash back that she describes in present tense
-she uses words like sandwiched, untamable, unruly, tangled, knotted, corkscrew. Words that could also describe someone's teenage years
-she uses scents to bring her back to different times
-There are many traces of ethnicity like black girls, semitic afro, Jersey Mafioso (Italians?), Jewfro, Hebro
- The entire poem is one long stanza that goes back and forth from present to past, from memory to memory. It moves from here to there kind of like a kinky curl

Junkyard quote 2 Week 3

“She floated down to Camelot; 
And as the boat-head wound along 
The willowy hills and fields among, 
They heard her singing her last song, 
The Lady of Shalott.”


The Lady of Shalott, Alfred, Lord Tennyson

Junkyard quote week 3

"Insect ligaments, I'm the bee's knees."
                          -Childish Gambino

Free write week 2

Hovering morning birds spoiled by the feeder.
On my patio I scope the shift in their beaks. Ha!
They misplaced their brunch spoiled guts with wings!
Can't use your beaks to break my plans. You can
leave me for the pinetrees, I might care
You can dance with my smoke as i sit
with my shit free chair. Move on my pets,
the thrill is on, my sunflower seeds, my adult
beverage. You have it made your hogged
flight power, your singing skills, but I still win.

Calisthenic 1 week 2

Introduction to poetry

The swordfish, learned what cannot be
taught "Drive, goddammit" leaves transition.
Children of the maze play The Pound Game
rough house- pouncing themselves,
some sort of I.Q. test. Unused bamboo
shoots the leaves off the basho tree.

Junkyard quote 4 Week 2

“Illnesses do not come upon us out of the blue.
They are developed from small daily sins against Nature.
When enough sins have accumulated, illnesses will suddenly appear.”

—	Hippocrates

Junkyard quote 3 Week 2

“Faith, to my mind, is a stiffening process, a sort of mental starch.”


E.M. Forster

Junkyard quote 2 Week 2

"Last night I dreamt I went to Manderley again....As
I stood there, hushed and still, I could swear that
the house was not an empty shell but lived and
breathed as it had lived before."

Rebecca,
Daphne du maurier

Junkyard quote 1 Week 2

When I Heard the Learn'd Astronomer

"How soon unaccountable I become tired and sick,
Till rising and gliding out I wander'd off by myself,
In the mystical moist night-air, and from time to time,
Look'd up in perfect silence at the stars."

Walt Whitman

Sign inventory week 1

electric girls (first two stanzas) - the first stanza sets the scene for what type of atmosphere is in the air. It seems like a happy anticipating mood. With the second stanza coming in with the abrupt "this is missing girls season" with a period it kind of darkens the poem. It seems like although the whether is hot and the girls are out playing , there are still dangerous people waiting around.

Response 2 to Kyley Elizabeth free write Week 1

I think this scrap of a poem is a good start. I think this poem is from a scene where a lover has been abandoned with nothing left but old gifts and letters from their ex. Uh. At first I didn't know what was going on but you were just setting the scene and with "smokey air" I got a view of like a cabin on a mountain side away from the city. When it gets to the seventh line the lines get longer and I understood the emotions the person was feeling. Ant the short, brief lines in the beginning made me feel isolated.

Response 1 to "The Nightingale Wished for Egg rolls" Week 1

I like how this is told through the eyes of a bird. I got a good picture in my mind of New York City and you describe it in a way that you can only understand if you put yourself in a bird's shoes. My favorite line is the first line with the rhyming and the alliteration. It caught my attention and really put me in to the bird's shoes. I also liked how the bird seemed to be stumbling across all of these sights and sounds but at the same time it was used to seeing a bunch of different things at once.